Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand how hurricane paths work

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I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I have a reading level above third grade

Mario Kart World wouldn’t be in the running for Game of the Year even if it was perfect - polygon.com

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

J.K. Rowling said that 65% of people in Britain are transgender. Where did she come up with that statistic?

I can read

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

Is a narcissist capable of understanding the damage and the hurt that they have caused in your relationship?

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t buy bullshit

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

Why is the left keep misrepresenting what Trump said about his daughter? When asked if he would date her if he weren’t her father, it simply reflected pride in raising a smart, respectful, and loving daughter with good morals all men want that no?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

In what ways does Islam oppress women?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I actually pay taxes

What is a partner in crime?

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I know who the president of Turkey really is

Are you struggling with weight loss and finding it hard to stay consistent? What’s your biggest challenge when trying to lose weight at home?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

What happened to The Simpsons deleted onscreen footage?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Why is it that women are stronger than men nowadays?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

What is your review of X-Men '97 season 1?

I can count

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

How can the democrats say Mr. Trump is bad when he is already fixing this country again and he's not even president yet?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I see through liars

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

What do you do when your family doesn’t care about you?

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

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I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

Here's Why This Year Will Be "Different" For Taylor Swift And Travis Kelce - BuzzFeed

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I have complete contempt for fakery

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t cotton to rapists